By D N Singh
In recent months Odisha has witnessed a sharp rise in the number of extramarital affair-related crimes. Some of them lead to ghastly ends. Murder, torture and indescribable incidents of crimes of incomprehensible nature.
The incidents reveal that the trend cuts across class barriers and is pervasive. What has played itself up through the recent occurrence of a high profile one in which a senior forest officer was allegedly killed. Reasons, extramarital affair.
And the genesis origins from extramarital affairs in which allegedly both the deceased and the widowed wife were involved.
Although the dead forest officer is not alive to defend his case, his wife has also fallen under the suspicion of having an extramarital relationship with the deceased’s senior, a Divisional Forest Officer. It cannot be said decisively as the police probe is on.
There were two other incidents of similar nature, one in Bhubaneswar and another in Kandhamal district recently.
In the last one year several such incidents had come to the limelight. And some of them are similarly chilling and shocking, like cut clips from crime serials.
What Prompts Extramarital Affairs
About a 40% women are involved in extramarital affairs and sadly a the majority of them are mothers. Well educated, says a Quora survey, and are well placed socially. But they want to shed the tag of the monotony of being family keepers looking after kids and husbands. As a result they suffer, says the survey, from a kind of oblivion that does not suit their life-style. What comes out here is not merely the discord in the relationship but, may be an emotional disconnect between the man and the wife, even being under one roof. Which down time saturates in distancing from each other and one tries to find solace in someone else.
Or getting married off under pressure, be it the girl or the boy. When the past continues to prevail upon the present, if either of the one had emotional intimacy with someone else. Which opens the floodgates of differences leading to a sense of detachment mentally.
Post Twenties Disillusionments
Reasons behind extramarital affairs can be found in early marriages when in twenties it is done. Once that phase is over the man or woman discovers new modes of satisfaction in coming in touch with other of the opposite sex and indulge in dating and so on.
An extra modern lifestyle can be the reason behind also. When societal openness leads to such proximities which eases the access to others’ wife or husband and resulting in extramarital relationship.
Looking at the cases in downtown areas such as among the tribal, where the rate of promiscuity is an accepted norm, it works in the long term leading to incidents as in Kandhamal where the wife killed her children and tried to kill herself when she found her husband with extramarital relation with someone.
Extremity of the crimes resulting from such illicit relations have in the past shaken the social fabric as scruples for answerability remain buried.
Either a man gets his genitals chopped off by lover or a two year old son killed by mother having illicit relationship in Raygada district or a man beats his wife to death once came to know about her intimacy with someone else.
Or a man burnt to death after his relations with someone else known, in Balikuda block, there the list is endless and so many incidents have come to the open that are indeed spine chilling.
But, in a state like Odisha where the people are mostly God fearing in nature, such extremities are given a free run and crimes follow, is something is not comprehensible.
Career Issues & Physical Dissatisfaction
Before marriage if the quest for careers is not addressed then it gives way to a kind of divide that lasts long. In other ways, some people accept a relationship in the hope of advancement in their career. But that remains the broad reason and normally the combination of many which deprive many then leads to extramarital affairs.
And broadly, an untold yet deeply impacting cause is found to be dissatisfaction in physical relationships. Which goes without saying that the cause can be traced in any direction. Dissatisfaction stems from various reasons and which finds an outlet in a relationship outside the family.
About the Author:
DN Singh is a Bhubaneswar-based senior journalist.
This is the personal opinion of the author. The views expressed in this write up have nothing to do with the www.prameyanews.com